My friend Emily Minor

Emily and I became friends while I was working at the Palm Beach Post in the early 1990’s. We were drawn to each other because of our Midwest roots. We are and will always be Ohio gals at heart. Her family became my home away from home when I lived in South Florida for seven years. Her husband Marty even went to Ohio University just like I did. There was always something to talk about when I would spend hours and sometimes days at their lovely home.

She is a longtime South Florida journalist who for many years worked as a columnist for The Palm Beach Post. Always honest and aimed for the gut, her Real Life columns examined the triumphs and struggles of everyday people. In the summer of 2008, she took a buyout from the newspaper and began freelance writing and working on her cottage industry business - funky and fabulous custom aprons found at alltherageaprons.com

Emily has lived with Type I insulin-dependent diabetes since 1989 and wears an insulin pump. In January of 2007, she began a weight-loss program and spent the next 12 months losing 50 pounds. Now happily slender, she works every day - every day! - At keeping that weight off. She lives in West Palm Beach, Fl., with her husband and son and enjoys armchair politics, napping and Jazzercise. She does not enjoy yelling at her kid about his messy room, although she does this nearly every day.

When the winter weather gets to me I call her and let her know that I am on my way to spend sometime by their pool. They live near the Intercoastal waterway. My tennis shoes are the first thing in my suitcase because I can’t wait to take a long walk along the water and listen to the tunes that her husband just loaded on my ipod.

I am sure that you will come to love my friend as much as I do. She is my weight loss hero. Living with Type 1 diabetes has been hard for her but she was able to loss her extra pounds safely even during a time when she lost both of her parents and left her beloved job.

Our conversations will always be honest and filled with humor. Emily never holds back on what she thinks and that is why I love her so much. I am sure you will adore her as much as I do.

The small blessings of good eating habits

I changed the way I ate earlier this year not to lose weight but to get pregnant.

My husband and I had been trying for more than a year to conceive. With my 40th birthday quickly approaching, I was getting desperate. I didn’t want to undergo invasive and costly fertility treatment, so I went to see an acupuncturist instead. A friend who had recently gotten pregnant recommended her.

The acupuncturist stressed healthy eating along with treatments. She asked for a meal diary. She picked it apart and made suggestions. Soon, I stopped eating refined sugars—no soda pop, no cookies, cake, etc.—white breads and most meats. I eliminated caffeine and cut way back on my dairy (cheese, milk, etc.). I piled up on vegetables, especially broccoli and cauliflower. I never felt better.

I lost about 6 pounds. But best of all, three weeks later I was pregnant.

The Better Choice

What started simply as calorie counting has turned into a lifestyle for Elisabeth. She shed 100 pounds of unwanted fat through eating small meals every few hours and burning as many calories as possible (six days at the gym a week). Currently, she’s helping her boyfriend – a self-proclaimed meat & potatoes man – to adapt some healthier eating habits from her “flexitarian lifestyle” (mostly vegetarian with the occasional free-range chicken breast). Here is the first look into her life and how her transformation has changed her life.

On Sunday night, I did a little Christmas shopping at Tower City with my boyfriend on his way to the airport for his return flight to Harrisburg. (Ah, the joys of a long-distance relationship! He lives about 5 1⁄2 hours by car from Cleveland and – for a quick weekend visit – the $200 direct flight is a no-brainer). While we were there, we decided to grab a bite at Houlihan’s. I should mention that I don’t usually frequent many chain restaurants – but dating Andy, I’ve found myself in more of them – something that we’re both planning on changing in the New Year.

As Andy and I looked at the menu, I automatically started my regular scan for anything healthy and vegetarian. Nope, nada, nothing. There usually isn’t, but I always look anyway. So it’s my job to make the menu work for me – and with these types of menus, I always scope out the burger section first. Oftentimes you can substitute a veggie patty for the standard beef. And since chain places rarely make their own veggie burgers, their typical frozen patty-version makes calorie counting pretty easy. And by choosing the steamed veggie, holding the bun and adding a salad, you can cobble together a pretty good meal. But no such luck here – no veggie burgers. Which sent me into salad territory to scope out an option with the least amount of tortilla strips and bacon with a maximum of actual veggies. I’m not at all shy about asking the waiter to hold those types of items, but if I’m spending $11 on a salad, I’d like to have more than just lettuce in my salad!

As I was figuring out my order, my boyfriend was narrowing down his finalists: grilled chicken breast with mashed potatoes and asparagus vs. baby back ribs with fries. I probably should have suggested that the grilled chicken was the better choice, but I didn’t say anything. After all, this relationship is pretty new and I don’t want to start pushing my healthy choices onto him (aka, “trying to change him”). So I stayed quiet.

A few minutes later, as a half rack of ribs and towering pile of fries got placed in front of him, I had a revelation. All these healthy ordering habits that have become so second nature to me were slowly born over the past seven years by many, many individual decisions. “No, I would not like fries with that.” “Can I get those veggies steamed, please?” “Instead of the potato and garlic bread, can I have a side salad? And yes, it is okay if there is an up-charge.”

It’s not like I became this super-careful orderer overnight…it just kinda happened…as, one time after another after another, I found a healthier option. The trick is pretty simple — whenever someone asks you, simply pick “the better choice.” It doesn’t have to be a perfect choice – but pick the better one.
Next time Andy is wrestling between ribs/fries vs. grilled chicken/veggies, I will definitely encourage him to make the better choice…and keep reminding myself to do the same!

Hey toots, I miss you

I have been putting off writing about my friend, Willa, for the last few months. It has been just too hard to gather my thoughts about a woman whose heart was a big as her smile. She died on Labor Day last year.  Her passing brought me to tears then and now as I think about how she wanted to get healthier for herself but time just ran out for her.

Willa worked at the newspaper’s cafeteria during the day and at night she cleaned an office building in an effort to cobble together enough money for her simple existance. The world saw how she struggled to get through her days as a woman that weighed 440 pounds. The small task of walking around the office eatery took her longer than most, but she always did it with a smile on her face.

Two years ago, I noticed that her white food service jacket was getting big on her and I asked her if she was losing weight. She came from behind the counter and put her finger on my nose and told me that I had inspired her to lose weight. 75 pounds were gone from her starting weight and she was proud that I had taken notice.

She was morbidly obese like two million other people in this country.  She knew the risks but didn’t want to have gastric bypass to solve her problem. Her sister, Kim, almost died from the surgery and she wanted to do it her way, just like I was doing it.

When her finger touched my nose and my heart that day, I vowed to help her lose more  weight.  I asked her to keep a food journal. I gave her my old scale, VCR and some tapes. I made her more accountable for her food habits and it was working. Some weeks went better than others, but she was trying.

One day, I went into the caferteria to get some ice and her friend asked me if I had seen Willa that day. She told me to wait right where I was and ran to get her. Willa came charging out of the kitchen with a grin from ear to ear and hugged the air right out of me. She was beside herself with joy that she was finally down below 300 pounds. It was only a pound below, but that single digit meant the world to her and to me.

Some months later, Willa wasn’t feeling her best, her stomach was bothering her. Then the phone call came on the holiday weekend. A friend thought I should know that Willa had passed away at age 46. I remember holding the phone in my hand for what seemed like hours in disbelief.

I went to see her for the last time at the funeral home. She was in the same red dress as the photo above. I cried for my friend then and still now. I wanted for her the life that I have found by losing my excess pounds and shedding the prejudice that the world has against the morbidly obese. I wanted the world to see what I saw, a woman with a pure heart.

She was my friend and my inspiration to help others overcome obesity.
Thank you, Willa.

 

Old Pals: New Challenges

 

Where do begin when you have nearly 30 years of memories to draw upon. Debbie and I met when we were both attending Ohio University. I was a photographer learning graphic design because well I was just drawn to the subject. Debbie was design major and we became friends when we spent countless all nighters in the old art building.

There were many laughs then and it never stopped over the years. After college, I moved to Washington D.C and asked Debbie if she wanted to make the move and we became roomates. Two Ohio gals living in the big city. We loved our pad in the heart of the city. There were many parties at our cool apartment and many diets that we went on to try to offset all the parties that we attended.

Recently, we had a good laugh when I brought up the cabbage diet that we tried. It was a large apartment but not large enough when we were both eating cabbage three times a day, if you know what I mean.

I moved back to Ohio and Debbie stayed in D.C. and got married and had kids. We never lost contact but time and distance does have a way of coming in the way of old friends. When I would return to the city she was the first one I would call and say that I was coming to town just like when I did the weekend that the photo was snapped that began my weight loss journey. She is the one standing beside me.

She like many of my friends are amazed that I was able to overcome obesity. Debbie is now battling a weight problem brought on by a busy schedule, a health condition and old father time. I asked her if she would like to join my blog and try to lose some weight by following my tips and she agreed.

We are excited about rekindling our friendship and we hope that our blog amuses you. Just two old friends talking about what gals talk about most, food, dieting and life.

Here are a few words from my pal:

My name is Debbie. I have been married for 19 years and have two children.

My daughter is 17 years old and my son is 14. I am a graphic designer by trade and I live in the suburbs of Washington, DC. 

I generally was in good health and maintained a decent weight until I hit my 40s.

My metabolism began slowing down and I was slowly putting on weight.

Then I began experiencing symptoms over the course of a year including joint pain and debilitating fatigue. My blood tests were not within normal ranges.  In the fall of 2001 I was diagnosed with Mixed Connective Tissue Disease (MCTD) and began a battery of medications to get me back on track. By 2002 I had accumulated a weight gain of 50 pounds. I was miserable.

It has been 8 years now. It has been a long journey back to “normal”. For the past 3 years I have been maintaining my health with the exception of the extra weight.  It’s time to deal with the weight and start an exercise program I can live with.

Next week: I gave Debbie an assignment to write down her goals for this year. Obtainable goals, she is bright but I am not sure that winning the Noble Peace Prize is in either one of our futures. I also asked her to write down her normal days schedule. Every Monday we will be checking in to mark her progress.

Reaching for the switch

 

For the record my mother bought me this light switch for Christmas several years ago. She giggled when I unwrapped the present, “Its art,” she proclaimed.

If you have seen the Joy Fit Club, one of the consistent questions that is asked of the participants is what was their Ah-ha moment. You know the one minute in time that the switch is finally turned on and you finally realize that your existence is in jeopardy if you don’t do something to make your health a priority.

My Ah-ha moment:

Looking back at that one minute in time is very clear to me even 5 years later. It was just a speck of time in my life but one that forever changed my existence. 

I hadn’t traveled much for a few years and I pushed myself out of my comfortable, overweight cocoon and went to visit friends from college that lived in Washington, DC. I had moved there right out of college and this merry band of friends is closely tied to the best times of my life.

When the snapshot came in the mail, I couldn’t wait to see the lasting images from my weekend trip. I was totally unprepared to see myself in comparison to my friends. We were all hamming it up for the camera like we had done so many times in the past but I seemed a stranger in that photograph.

Who was that woman in the back with the white dress?

Then it happened. The switch went on in my head. I sat there with the photos in my hand wanting to tear them up because I didn’t like what I saw. Not my friends but me. Who was that woman and how did she get to be so large? I knew the answers but it was that moment in time when I finally took action.

I finally admitted to myself that I had a problem and I needed to go about solving it. It was time to make myself a priority. It was time for me to fix me.

I was morbidly obese and the photos that I held in my hand were proof of that.

I needed to do something. I needed to finally stop ignoring my undeniable problem with food and confront it and myself.

Now people ask me all the time how I lost nearly 200 pounds, and I look them in the eye and tell to put down their fork and start moving their butts. Unfortunately that is when some turn off the switch and tune me out. They want quick solutions but there aren’t any. I am sorry.

But there are plenty of small steps that you can take to make your health a number one priority. Yes, making time for you. Time that is spent making sure that you have healthy, properly portioned meals. Time spent taking that walk that you always talk about taking. Time spent reading about good nutrition and time spent getting the right amount of sleep.

It’s New Years Day, time for new beginnings, time for you to make your health a number one priority this year.

 

« Previous Page